Long have I envied great writers. People who can seemingly take something out of thin air, and use it to make a statement. Or champion a clause. Or create beautiful works of art in the form of storytelling. Fiction or nonfiction
Writing is something I am terrible at. Or at least I think I am, possibly because I set my standards too high. All the same, I feel conflicted everytime I want to write an article.
Questions pop up in my head. Am I writing this for myself, or for a designated audience? Who is my audience if at all? In the end I really have no idea asides some comments here and there. But what I want to do, is capture that state of mind. Those memories and moments instilled in writing, so it won’t be forgotten.
Writing has been an issue of mine since I started this blog. I currently have ~138 drafts on hand. These topics range from a large number of topics, from science, business, gaming, and stories of my life
There’s lots of things I wish to talk about, but seemingly don’t find the time for. Work has been taking a toll on me, projects are behind schedule, and things that I wish to achieve are set behind schedule. Shit happens. I constantly have meetings to attend, friends to see, and I can’t seem to fathom why writing is a good investment at all.
Writing to me has always been a rote process. One that has been forced. School has practically trained me to think this way. Turn in X paper with Y number of words, or else get deducted for points. Back in those days, I simply didn’t have enough interesting things to write about. So I constantly bullshitted my way whenever possible. Because it was forced on me – I felt no satisfaction writing on my own.
Infact, I still have essays 15 years ago I’ve written in middle school. If I ran it through a quality / plagarism checker, half of the things I wrote would be redundant. Things I expressed in a paragraph, could be summed in one sentence. Or even a few words.
But this doesn’t mean I am not trying. My commitment I made myself this year, was to write about something every few weeks. There is value in reflection, and sharing thoughts that others might benefit from. No matter how small of an impact it can be. Regardless if the topic is technical or not
I don’t know if locking myself in a room for 3 hours and forcing myself to write every few weeks is the best idea though. Still, it’s progress.